In 2012 writing your own wedding vows was kooky and wild but in the 2020s it's almost a given.
I wrote most of this email back in 2012 but I've slightly edited for a 2024 read.
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Writing your own vows a process I recommend everyone goes down, though of course you don’t have to. My reason for investing in personal vows is that aside from the requirements in Australian law, your vows serve a very personal purpose in your marriage.
They are the few words and phrases that will set the tone and the theme of your life together going forward.
I have books and books and even more books filled with vow ideas, and there’s even more on the internet, but here’s what Britt and I did. You might notice we collaborated on the closing lines.
Britt’s Vows
I couldn’t be happier. I am delighted to be marring you today and vowing to love you forever.
5 years ago, after you asked me to dinner and you split the bill, we became just friends and you became known as Spilt the Bill Josh.
And today, as if someone has pressed fast forward on our lives, we stand here pledging our futures to each other.
I want nothing more than to be a wonderful wife to you, to be loyal and someone you trust and confide in.
I promise to always be there for you, to take care of you, to be your lover and best friend.
I promise to match every chick flick with a guy movie, every superfood with a bad carb and every tear with laughter.
When we create a family, I vow to be the best mum I can be.
I promise to trust you, to appreciate you and to honour you at all costs.
If you promise to share this life with me, then I promise to make it as exciting and happy, spontaneous and passionate as it can be, taking every breath I have, to strive for your happiness.
And you and I know better than anyone that there will be all sorts of valleys and roadblocks during that journey, but I promise to never quit, and to love you more and more in those moments.
I, Brittany, give you this ring as a promise and symbol of my heart and faithfulness, my love and commitment to you. When I am angry, I will seek to be kind, when we speak I will be truthful and each day of my life, I will be faithful to you.
Josh’s Vows
Brittany Snow, you will never know, just how beautiful you are, to me, but I promise to spend the rest of my life telling you.
You are, the best thing, that has ever happened to me. And for that I’m eternally thankful.
I promise to always protect you, even if it annoys you,
To encourage you, so we can conquer the world together,
To uphold you, because you’re worth it,
And excite you, beyond your wildest dreams,
And we’ll write a beautiful story together
To always be grateful for you, for your love for me
To value you, and who you are
To provide for you, and always pay for our meals,
I’ll never split the bill … again
I promise to never lead you to anger, unless it’s about me whistling, or wearing clothes that are daggy
I promise to try not to frustrate you,
To bring you peace, and being peace into our home,
And always make you smile and laugh.
I promise to love you unconditionally,
To pray for you always,
To thank God for you every morning.
Because you and I are better together.
I, Joshua, give you this ring as a promise and symbol of my heart and faithfulness, my love and commitment to you. When I am angry, I will seek to be kind, when we speak I will be truthful and each day of my life, I will be faithful to you.
Another bonus of writing your own vows, and keeping a digital copy, is that you can go back to them, like I just have in editing this piece, and cry a happy tear as you remember how much occurred on that one powerful moment.
Another controversial part of our wedding was me pulling out my iPhone 4 to read my vows out of my notes.
And I was so sure Britt had done the same thing until I went back to the photos ...
💍 Josh Withers is an Australian wedding celebrant based in Hobart who travels the world every week creating meaningful, fun, and honest marriage ceremonies for adventurous couples just like you.
📱 Follow Josh on Instagram, Threads, Facebook, Mastodon, Micro.Blog, or in a Qantas airport lounge somewhere.